Archive for the ‘Random Musings’ Category

Once in a very long while

Tuesday, October 27th, 2009

Over the course of many weeks I began to notice a strange song on country radio. What I had at first dismissed as typical ‘WE RAWK LIKE ARMY FRAGGLES’ claptrap, I began to realize possessed a certain… tone, a subtext if you will, hidden deep within the song’s imagery and phrases.

I’ll pause now and let you look at the lyrics:

American Ride by Toby Keith

I can’t tell you precisely which line first caught my attention. Perhaps, “Got herself a record, can’t even sing a note”. Or maybe it was my pause in curiosity “Is he saying Bride or Lie?”

I mentioned in passing to some friends that I was under the suspicion that Toby Keith had attempted an experiment in irony. I wasn’t entirely sure as I had yet to actually listened to it intently, but I had hope. When I finally saw the song in full, laid out like some gift from Jesus, I couldn’t contain myself. A former professor of mine dreams of having a telethon fundraiser one day for people without irony. I do believe we have found its theme music!

And it doesn’t end there, watch the video:

American Ride by Toby Keith

More than that, watch others attempt a reaction to the song here:

Country Universe.Net

My particular favorite is this gem from Cowboy Blue, who says:

When I first heard this song I ended up neutral too. I wanted to like it because I love Toby’s music and loved the feel of the song, but at the same time I found it to be very out there and maybe to loaded with comentary. This song will probably grow on me very fast and become a favorite of mine, but I can safely say if I followed it word for word it would certainly contradict with a lot of my personal beliefs.

Definitely one of the most interesting songs of the year.

A few more people cast aspersians on the song, going so far as to accuse Mr. Keith (or the songwriters themselves) of misogyny. But Mr. TBone was there to defend:

Toby Keith is AMERICAN in every sense of the word, and the fact that you judge him and this song is why there are songs like this…. sorry, but I hated hated hated this song the first two times I heard it and by the 3rd time, I got it. Toby is Man enough and American enough to say anything about America. If you don’t agree with the song, you live with your blinders on or you shouldn’t live in America. Period. Our Country is F’d Up and we’re damn proud of it. “That’s us! That’s Right! Gotta Love this American Ride!!!!”

I almost want to go so far as to say that Toby Keith’s entire career: the pro-military, boot-in-your-ass, Dixie Chick baiting, giving whiskey to horses career has set him up for this one perfect moment in time. It almost hurts to think about it.

Ursula K. Le Guin

Wednesday, October 21st, 2009

Happy birthday!

6 Degrees of Kevin Brockmeier

Tuesday, September 29th, 2009

Kevin Brockmeier is a writer.

I think Kevin Brockmeier graduated from the Iowa Writer’s Workshop because I recently came across “Some Things About Kevin Brockmeier” in Post Road #8 written by Thisbe Nissen which indicates that she was there, at Iowa, when he was there.

I once spent a day with Thisbe Nissen in the French Quarter because she was in New Orleans as the Newcomb College Zale Writer in Residence.

Newcomb College no longer exists, not really, because after Katrina the two undergraduate colleges (Newcomb and A&S) became merged and now there’s Tulane University and the Newcomb Institute.

My mother thinks they should rename the undergraduate school Newcomb and maybe that would pacify all the women who banded together to sue King Cowen over his move to subsume the South’s first coordinate college for women.

Thisbe took a lot of pictures of doors and chipped paint while I told her half-remembered ghost stories about a convent. We met my mother at a po-boy restaurant I’d never been to, and I asked about MFA programs. She applied to 15 and got into half, including Iowa, and she had a collection of short stories published by the time I met her so I figured I was screwed.

A few years later I was at SIU and Kevin Brockmeier came for Devil’s Kitchen. He read a story about god’s overcoat and prayers that in the end were put in fortune cookies by a Chinese restaurant.

Sometimes chocolate milk isn’t up for discussion.

A World Without Internet

Tuesday, February 3rd, 2009

Memory, all alone in the moonlight

Sunday, February 1st, 2009

James Maxey recently posted an entry on his blog about remembering the events in his life with arcs and storylines. I used to be obsessed with memory, perhaps because I was frequently praised for having a good one. I remember feeling frustrated with my parents if they ever told a story wrong, and bless my own heart, I often tried to correct them.

Since then I’ve realized that memories (even mine, perish the thought) are imperfect and while it may be comforting to believe that somewhere locked in our brains is the perfect recollection of dates, events, smells, tastes, and feelings, scientific studies suggest otherwise. I would point you to those scientific studies but alas I can’t remember where to find the link.

What I find interesting, or perhaps troubling, is given that our memories are imperfect, and at best all we can remember are collages of perceptions, all of our future perceptions, actions, and thoughts are in turn influenced by those perceptions. In essence we take flawed data, assume it to be not flawed, and then use that data to collect more flawed data. Occasionally we become self-aware of this flawedness and try to adjust, but lacking the capacity to calibrate to 0 makes it very difficult.

When I taught English at SIU I tried to get my students to question whatever it was that we were reading or discussing. How is the reasoning flawed, the support biased. To whom is the article addressed and why is that important. At the other end of that spectrum is the world view that because everything is flawed, biased, ignorant, we must tear it down or worse, believe the opposite. To use an extreme… ‘This scientist misrepresents his data about global warming, and he doesn’t disclose his inherent self-interest THEREFORE he is wrong and global warming doesn’t exist.’

Well, that’s not *exactly* what they say, but my perception of many arguments on the subject given to me by 102 students boils down to that.

Conspiracy theories seem to operate on the same premise. 9/11 triggered a series of events that led to the invasion of Iraq. President Bush wanted to invade Iraq in the first place, therefore President Bush planned 9/11.

What?

And again, that’s a bastardized imperfect distillation of 2 hours of nonsense, but most of it all seems to echo the idea of ‘Because I can conceive of another reason that is based on the premise that everyone lies, serves their own self-interest, and nothing is what it seems, my conception of what could be true therefore must be true.’ I always liked that line from Sherlock Holmes by way of Star Trek: After we eliminate the impossible, whatever is left, however improbable, must be the truth.’

Oh irony, thy name is internet! I was afraid of misquoting the line, so I typed in a few phrases from it and did a google search. The first link? An article about 9/11 conspiracy theories which ends with the phrase, “Most importantly, they need to ask and seek an honest answer to the question: who benefited from the catastrophe that killed thousands on September 11, 2001?” I won’t read the article, nor will I link to such hogwash, but after skimming a few paragraphs it seems to suggest that Israel is responsible for 9/11. I think it’s very important to keep an open mind for possibilities. But at the end of the day, if you’re going to cling to one of those possibilities you better believe in it for more than a love of old quotes!

What’s frightening to me is the short memory of the world. If someone spouts nonsense for long enough, eventually people start to repeat it and it repeats and repeats until eventually you forgot that it was nonsense. There’s an excellent video on Ted.com where a woman talks about memes. I happened to watch it after discussing the movie Religulous with my brother in which he was trying to reason through the evolutionary process that led to religion. After watching the video I started to look at information as an amoral entity, stripped of value judgments of ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ or ‘more right’ or ‘more wrong’. Information spreads and adapts itself in such a way as to foster its being spread.

When did we start saying ‘So help me god’ after the Presidential oath? It’s not in the constitution. Why do we say ‘under god’ in the pledge of allegiance? It wasn’t added until the 1950s but listen to some right wing whacko talk about it and you’d think that all the founding fathers carved it into their skins.

Why do some denominations think Catholics aren’t Christians? Where do they think the Protestants came from? Why do Christians forget that Jesus was Jewish? And that for a time, in order to become Christian you had to convert to Judaism. Why is the Catholic church suddenly against abortion? They didn’t have a problem with it for the first 8 or so centuries of their existence. Mary Magdalene is a whore? Since when?

I hate to pick on religion so much, but it’s one of the quickest and easiest examples of where information has deviated so much. Groups cherry pick Leviticus to support some bigotries, but not others, yet stomp and holler with righteous indignation they’re just being true to the source material. Stone your leaders to death every time one of them has an affair, then I’ll let you keep that argument.

I take it back, I love to pick on religion so much. I can think of nothing more emblematic of the problem with flawed perception as the idea that we should structure our laws, our schools, our way of life around the notion that god exists. God may exist. I sincerely hope he does. But every time someone says “God is watching over us and he has plans for us and he blesses the United States” and blah blah blah I want to tear my hair out. God is the safety net of the willfully ignorant. Why should we worry about the environment? God created the earth and he’ll take care of it. Why should we explore space? God created the earth and we shouldn’t leave it. Why should we worry about anything other than justifying our actions with ludicrous interpretations of a text that God himself, if he exists, did not write.

If we perceive fortuitous circumstances in our life as the work of guardian angels, who consciously and deliberately intervene on our behalf, then don’t we begin to expect that intervention? Wouldn’t it be far more productive to recognize them as random acts? Appreciate them yes, but don’t plan on them. You don’t think that when you wake up Christmas morning some immortal man with gravity defying reindeer has left you a plasma TV downstairs do you? No, you have to go out and buy your own TV. And your own Red Ryder BB gun.

That said, information, even ridiculous information, can serve a purpose. Another Ted.com video features a man who spent a year living Biblically. He ate, wore, and acted purely according to the rules of the Bible. He had to make some exceptions of course (New York law is a stickler about stoning), but overall he said that doing things because the Bible told him to, eventually became doing things because he realized they were good things to do. I’ve always been a fan of Karma even though I don’t believe in the religious aspect of it. If you do good things, good things will come back to you. Do bad things, and bad things will come back to you. I mess up all the time, but I always tip my waitress.

Given our own self-centeredness, it’s not particularly surprising that we become most irritated when people do things we don’t like about ourselves. Last week during dinner I corrected someone twice about referring to George Bush as President Bush and emphasized that while we may vehemently despise many of his actions, we still need to respect the office. I’m disrespectful all the time. Where do I come off calling someone else on it? But if I don’t call her on it, even though I don’t have the moral standing to do it, how can I make the mental connection half a beat later that says ‘Moron, you do it too. Stop it.’ Just because you shouldn’t do something, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t.

That made more sense in my head.

In an internet meme called ‘25 Random Things’ I told a story about how I bought a guitar after saving my brother from drowning. At the time I thought it was important to have a revelation about the preciousness of life and fulfilling your dreams. Over the years I’ve tried to learn to play the damn thing, but all in all it’s easier to have the epiphany than to do something about it.

That doesn’t mean we should stop trying to have epiphanies. I know that memory is hopelessly flawed, but since there’s not a whole lot I can do to turn my brain into an internal hard drive complete with Google search capabilities, the best thing I can do is crawl down off the cross, use the wood–you know the rest.

44 Americans

Tuesday, January 20th, 2009

Sorry Mr. President, but only 43 have taken the presidential oath. Grover Cleveland was the 22nd and 24th President, which has confused many for decades.

I tried to find a technicality for you, but Dick Cheney, though having served as acting president twice, did not take the oath during the invocation of the 25th amendment.

Rhetorical Analysis

Tuesday, January 20th, 2009

To me there seems an intrinsic irreverence to randomness. A straight world is boring. I shall put a donkey in pinstripes and it shall smoke the proverbial frying pan.

More Myth

Monday, October 9th, 2006

Mike Allen has updated the Mythic Delirium site with more info on Mythic II. It includes samples from the anthology and a direct link to pay pal to purchase the book from Mike.

Go forth and purchase

Sugar and Spice and Everything Vice

Friday, September 15th, 2006

This evening ABC showed a special on how teenage girls are using cell phones and computers and other technological gadgets to destroy the lives of their schoolmates.

I’ve been preaching the meanness of girls for a while so this is nothing new to me. Hell I’ve done it. My cousin Ellen and I used to call our little cousin Caroline ’step cousin’. No reason. We just did. She didn’t like it; we did it more.

Neither of those cousins read this blog, so I’ll just apologize to the universe. It was cruel and wrong and what can I say. I’m a girl.

I’ve always said it’s because we’re socialized to be non-violent. If a guy gets mad, he’ll hit you and move on with his life. If a girl gets mad, she destroys you. Strips you of your friends, your self esteem, and sometimes gets you to switch schools. If women ruled the world, there would be no wars. Because there would be no people. We’d have killed ourselves off or we’d be so busy crying all the time we’d forget to populate the planet.

Another problem is parenting. (Not you, Mom) At a certain school that shall remain nameless, there was a clique of girls known as the Elite 5 (even though there were 7 of them… don’t ask). They didn’t like a particular girl in their grade, so somehow they managed to get the rest of the entire class to stop speaking to her. Now what I heard from friends, and some adults, the girls acted in a manner similar to their mothers. The same pettiness. The same tendency towards exclusion. The same attitude.

Not every upper middleclass woman acts as if she walked staight off the set of ‘Desperate Housewives’. But some do. So is it any surprise that there’s a generation of their clones going through school right now? Just watch an episode or two of ‘My Super Sweet Sixteen’ or ‘Laguna Beach’ (If you can stomach it. I suggest painkillers. Strong ones). Watch the teenager. Then watch the mother try to live vicariously through her daughter. Sad.

Fortunately my mother does not act this foolishly. Probably because quite frankly, a poet’s life is not that interesting. How many action flicks have you seen entitled ‘Poet Wars: Revenge of the Sestina’?

Anyway, back to girls. Are they evil because of society? Their mothers? MTV? Innate corruptibility of the double X Chromosome?

And in other news (wherein Hel completely ignores the need to conclude her thoughts), Stephen Colbert had the Ambassador from Hungary to the United States on his show regarding the vote (which he won… twice) to name a new bridge in Budapest. My life is officially complete.

Blah

Tuesday, June 6th, 2006

I was going to do a nice long update about tons of random stuff… but I don’t feel like it. Instead, I’ll just ask that you send happy thoughts in the general direction of Greenville, NC where Oliver is completing a schload of physics problems. He posted one in an IM to me. It did not look like fun.